Why is this so hard? If you are older / wiser than me, which is likely, hear me now: why do I have to beg, cajole, plead, and coerce just to get you to sit down and share with me a smidgin of the wisdom that the Good Lord, the School of Hard Knocks, the IRS, and so on have taught you?

I have experienced this keep-it-to-my-selfishness in my personal life, in our church leadership experiences, and in my career. I know I don’t know much, and I know people who know more than I do, but I don’t know how on earth to get them to share. Let’s recap:

Fifteen months, scores of phone calls and two face-to-face meetings before one couple would share with us about things they learned in their thirty years of marriage.

An older couple in Tulsa whom we approached about mentoring us…they agreed, and we were only ONCE able to schedule dinner with them. All the rest were cancelled, postponed, calls unreturned, “Oh yeah, we need to have you guys over…” in church on Sunday (but wouldn’t set a date), etc.

Five phone calls, three brush-offs and several e-mails before I could land a half-hour coffee meeting with a local business leader I respect. I’m now five (unresponded to) e-mails into attempting to schedule a follow-up meeting.

And the two times that I’ve been on the receiving end of “Hey, we should get together!” from church leadership was in response to specific leadership mistakes I had made. Boy, they came out of the woodwork then…and rightly so, but where was the coaching prior to this?

Now, I know that these are all busy people. And I know the impetus for finding mentoring has to be on me. But c’mon! Work with me a little! At least respond to my e-mails!

I don’t want to grow passively. I don’t want to get twelve years into my career or marriage or ministry and accidentally stumble on some pearl of wisdom and be like, “Wow, I wish I’d known that years ago!” I don’t want a shallow rate of growth, improving casually from time-to-time.

Wise people: I am hungry for your wisdom. Share it…please?